High-conflict divorces can have a substantial impact on the stress levels of the divorcing spouses and everyone around them. While there are no truly “foolproof” methods for navigating a high-conflict divorce, an experienced family law attorney, who sees divorces at a variety of conflict levels on a daily basis, can often be in a position to offer both perspective and practical strategies for managing high-conflict divorces to clients who find themselves in these often uncomfortable scenarios. Schedule a consultation with a South Carolina divorce lawyer from King Law Offices by calling 888-748-KING today.
Recognizing High-Conflict Divorces
“High” is inherently a relative qualifier and therefore to some extent “in the eye of the beholder.” What one couple experiences as an unbearable degree of conflict in their relationship may not seem particularly troubling to another set of partners. The same kind of disparity can also be present between the partners in a marriage, and is in fact a common factor in one spouse’s decision to pursue a divorce: Sometimes what one partner considers to be a healthy level of directness in asserting his or her position on household or relationship issues can feel to the other spouse like a constant barrage of attacks, or what one spouse thinks of as going along to keep the peace can seem to their partner as a deeply unsettling attempt to conceal their true feelings.
High Conflict Divorces in Psychology and Counseling
Formal definitions offer somewhat greater precision, but on the other hand they are not necessarily developed around the experiences of the spouses themselves. In psychology, for instance, discussions of “high-conflict” divorces have long been centered on the effects these divorces have on children, with a 1994 article shared by the American Psychological Association (APA) notably choosing to address the topic in terms of “interparental conflict,” and a 2022 Frontiers in Psychology research paper focusing, again, on the implications of high-conflict divorces for co-parenting practices and their impacts on the couple’s shared children in the post-divorce family dynamic.
High Conflict Divorces in Legal Practice
Legal professionals, similar to psychologists and family counselors, tend to frame high-conflict divorces as ones in which one or both parties to the divorce exhibit(s) a tendency to initiate legal actions more frequently, and in many cases more aggressively, than the average divorce client. Not unlike the spouses’ own perception of their relationship dynamic, this assessment is necessarily structured to some degree by each attorney’s personal experience and his or her client history. By comparison to the psychological researchers who have contributed to the formal literature on high-conflict divorces, however, family law attorneys are in many cases less likely to focus their consideration of conflict in divorce on the perceptions of, or impacts on, a couple’s children – although an experienced divorce attorney may suggest that you petition the South Carolina Family Court to appoint a private guardian ad litem, as described by the South Carolina Bar Association (SCBA) to ensure that children affected by the divorce do have a voice in the courtroom. This recommendation, which divorce lawyers do sometimes make to clients in high-conflict divorces, exemplifies an approach family law attorneys often take toward high-conflict divorce cases, which is to identify legal tools that can serve practical functions in helping to mitigate the potential problems that often arise in these divorces, address serious concerns as they come up, and de-escalate inflammatory or unnecessarily combative interactions whenever possible.
Legal Strategies for Managing High-Conflict Divorce
There are a variety of legal tools that may be implemented to help offset the potentially negative effects of a high-conflict divorce. The most appropriate combination will depend on the specifics of the case, as high-conflict divorces can stem from different causes and may involve a number of complicated factors. An experienced South Carolina divorce attorney with King Law Offices may be able to advise you if you have questions about the strategies that might make the most sense in your personal situation.
Alternative Dispute Resolution (ADR)
Most couples approaching divorce in South Carolina can expect to be ordered by the Family Court overseeing their case to attend at least three hours of family law mediation before the court will schedule a hearing in the case, according to South Carolina ADR Rule 5. Getting a high-conflict spouse (or two) to negotiate productively in a mediation session can be difficult. However, there are two key exceptions to this general requirement.
Mediation Exemptions
If either of the following conditions holds true, then the couple may not have to attend mediation.
- The divorcing couple’s situation qualifies for, and at least one of the parties seeks, an exemption under ADR Rule 3(c).
- The divorcing couple is able to file a Proof of ADR with the clerk’s office of the court overseeing the case.
The specifics of these rules can be important in high-conflict divorces for two main reasons:
- Some of the statutory reasons for considering a case exempt from South Carolina’s ADR requirements relate to domestic abuse. If either party is unsafe, then it may make sense to request an exemption from ADR obligations under ADR Rule 3(c).
- Mediation is widely used in family law cases, but it is not the only method of alternative dispute resolution, and Rule 5(g) does not specify any particular type of ADR – only that the parties must show proof of their participation.
Non-Mediation Options for South Carolina ADR
In high-conflict divorces, mediation is not always hopeless, but it often faces an uphill battle against both spouses’ ingrained tendencies. In these situations, it may make sense to turn to a different form of alternative dispute resolution, and consider taking part in early neutral evaluation (ENE) under South Carolina ADR Rule 14 instead. ENE is similar to mediation in that it relies on the services of a skilled neutral third party, but unlike a mediator the professional neutral in an early neutral evaluation listens to abbreviated versions of each side’s core arguments and then provides a succinct evaluation of the strengths and weaknesses of their respective cases.
The neutral will also typically suggest some paths toward settlement negotiations, usually beginning with areas of common ground he or she has identified while listening to the parties’ arguments. Early neutral evaluation can be especially effective at breaking “stalemate” scenarios for high-conflict divorces in which the tendency to instigate new conflicts is heavily weighted toward one spouse, as the evaluation of arguments can sometimes help the party most prone to seeking conflict to gain a more realistic estimation of his or her outcomes if the case goes to a divorce trial.
Orders of Protection
Not all high-conflict divorces involve abusive situations. There are important distinctions between an exhaustingly argumentative disposition and the physical violence, or threats of violence, that qualify as domestic abuse under S.C. Code § 20-4-20. In many cases, however, high-conflict divorces may also be characterized by patterns of abusive behavior, which can escalate as the divorce process gets underway. In these situations, a South Carolina family law attorney may recommend seeking protection orders from the court, and guide a client who is concerned for his or her safety through the process of filing a petition for temporary orders of protection. Depending on the circumstances, these orders may be applied to minor children living with the parent requesting protection, as well as to the spouse personally.
Talk With a South Carolina Family Law Attorney Experienced in Complex Divorce Cases
These are not the only possible legal strategies that can assist in managing high-conflict divorces, but they represent a sampling of the tools an experienced divorce lawyer may bring into play to safeguard a client’s interests throughout the process. Many family law attorneys will also recommend seeking support outside the legal arena, as high-conflict divorces can have a number of emotional, psychological, and in many cases even physical and financial, effects. Whether you consider yourself a high-conflict personality or an agreeable soul continually surprised by your ex’s recalcitrance, working with an experienced therapist or counselor may be helpful in helping you understand both yourself and the non-legal aspects of the divorce process better. To gain a deeper understanding of the legal options that may be available for mitigating and managing conflict in your own divorce case, schedule a consultation with King Law Offices today by calling 888-748-KING to connect with a member of our team near you.