Join us in our Cornelius office on May 3, 2025, as attorneys Patrick K. Bryan and Michael Chapel break down various legal aspects of separation and divorce – in a presentation entitled “Breaking Down Breaking Up.” In the spirit of said presentation, this article examines one of the most asked questions our family law attorneys get. That is:
What Does “Best Interest of the Child” Really Mean in North Carolina?
If you’re facing a custody dispute in North Carolina, you’ve likely encountered the phrase “best interest of the child.” This legal standard guides all custody decisions in the state, and though it may sound easy enough, its application is not always as straightforward as its name implies.
Understanding the Standard
In North Carolina, courts rely on the “best interest of the child” standard to ensure that custody arrangements prioritize the child’s overall welfare, stability, and development. What makes this standard challenging is that there is no definitive checklist or formula for any child—the determination is highly dependent on your specific family circumstances.
For parents navigating custody cases in Mecklenburg County and throughout North Carolina, understanding how this standard works can help you make more informed decisions for your child and family.
Key Factors in Child Custody Determinations
While North Carolina law doesn’t provide an exhaustive list of factors, courts typically consider the following when evaluating a child’s best interests:
The Child’s Relationship with Each Parent
Courts evaluate the bond between the child and each parent, considering which parent has been the primary caregiver and each parent’s historical involvement in the child’s life. Bobbit v. Eizenga, 768 S.E.2d 200 (N.C. App. 2014)
Each Parent’s Ability to Provide
Judges assess each parent’s ability to meet the child’s needs, including providing a stable home, education, medical care, and emotional support.
The Child’s Current Stability
Courts consider how custody changes might affect a child’s stability, including education, activities, social environment, and community connections. Cash v. Cash, 874 S.E.2d 653 (N.C. App. 2022)
Mental and Physical Health
The physical and mental well-being of all parties, including any substance abuse issues, are considerations that may significantly impact the court’s decision.
History of Domestic Violence or Abuse
Evidence of domestic violence, child abuse, or neglect is taken very seriously to ensure the child’s safety. Jordao v. Jordao, 849 S.E.2d 317, 326 (N.C. App. 2020)
Co-Parenting Willingness
Courts favor parents who encourage a healthy relationship between the child and the other parent, rather than those who attempt to alienate or interfere with custody time. In general, demonstrating cooperation with the other parent strengthens your position. Thomas v. Thomas, 757 S.E.2d 375 (N.C. App. 2014)
The Child’s Preference
While there’s no specific age when a child’s preference becomes determinative, courts will consider the wishes of children – particularly older and more mature children. In re A.J.T., 843 S.E.2d 192 (N.C. 2020)
It’s important to note that while some factors may be weighted more heavily than others, one factor is rarely determinative on its own. The judge’s decision is dependent on the individual child and the specific circumstances presented.
Common Misconceptions About the “Best Interest” Standard in North Carolina:
Gender Preference Myth
There is no legal presumption that mothers have superior rights to custody over fathers. North Carolina law makes no automatic preference based on gender—the best interest standard applies equally to both parents.
Financial Advantage Misconception
While a parent’s ability to provide is considered, income is not wholly determinative. The parent with more financial resources is not guaranteed custody. Both parents are entitled to parent their child, and a parent’s ability to provide stability, love, and support can often outweigh pure financial considerations. In re B.C.T., 828 S.E.2d 50 (N.C. App. 2019)
Past Mistakes Myth
A common misconception is that one parent’s past mistake(s) will automatically cost them custody. While a parent’s criminal history or substance abuse history will likely be considered, isolated incidents—particularly those in the distant past—are rarely determinative on their own.
Child’s Preference Misconception
Although courts shall consider a child’s preferences, those preferences are not automatically followed. The judge will factor in the child’s age, maturity level, and all other relevant factors.
Joint Custody Assumption
While courts often encourage joint custody arrangements, they are not the default outcome. There are no default custody outcomes in North Carolina courts. The court will consider various factors that may make other arrangements more appropriate.
Permanent Custody
Custody orders are often labeled as “permanent.” This, however, is somewhat misleading. Custody orders are always subject to being modified if a party demonstrates a substantial change in circumstances affecting the child.
Common Custody Arrangements
Custody resolutions can take many forms, whether through a judge’s order or agreement between the parties. North Carolina law requires parents to attempt mediation before proceeding to trial, so some cases are resolved during the mediation process. Others may settle during litigation with a consent order, while some proceed through a full trial.
No single resolution method is inherently superior—each approach can result in an enforceable court order.
Custody schedules are customized to fit family circumstances, including work schedules, social commitments, and parental preferences. Some common arrangements include:
Joint Custody
When a child splits time between both parents (not always equally), or when both parents share decision-making authority regarding education, healthcare, and other important matters.
Sole Physical or Legal Custody
When the child mostly lives with one parent or one parent has exclusive decision-making authority.
Unsupervised Visitation
When the non-custodial parent spends time with their child without requiring third-party oversight. Provisions may vary regarding visitation location and circumstances.
Supervised Visitation
When the non-custodial parent’s time with their child requires the presence of a third party—either an individual chosen by the parties or judge, a social worker, or a court-appointed professional.
Protecting Your Rights and Demonstrating the Best Interests of Child
Most parents believe they know what’s best for their child—and understandably so, as they know their family better than any judge who will preside over your case. However, consulting with an experienced family law attorney can provide crucial insight into the factors that may affect the final custody decision in any specific situation.
With a deeper understanding of these legal concepts, parents can pursue their custody goals with greater confidence. Each family is unique, and custody strategies should be tailored to meet the individual needs of each child and family.
If you are facing a custody dispute, consider contacting an attorney. The experienced attorneys at King Law Offices can work with you to ensure your rights, ensure your child(ren)’s best interests are most appropriately considered, and find some resolution to the dispute. Call (888) 748-KING (5464) to schedule a consultation today.
Want to Learn More?
Join Attorneys Patrick K. Bryan and Michael Chapel for “Breaking Down Breaking Up” on May 3, 2025, at our Cornelius office. This exclusive event will dive deeper into the legal aspects of separation, divorce, and child custody in North Carolina.
Reserve your spot now: Click here to sign up
Don’t miss this opportunity to get informed, ask questions, and gain clarity on your next steps.